As a person with a severe acquired disability, I have always prioritized choosing jobs that put the least physical strain on my body. It was a necessary choice for survival. If my body broke down, my life would become unsustainable. That is why, for the past ten years, I have prioritized working within my capabilities.

However, during those ten years, I lost sight of what I truly wanted to do and what I genuinely enjoyed. By repeatedly making choices based solely on survival, I found myself with no time or space to consider the true meaning of my life.

The Decision to Make This My Last Livelihood Job

I have decided that my current job will be my last livelihood work. This decision is not simply because I am tired. Rather, it stems from a strong sense of urgency—a fear that if I continue this way, my life will pass me by without me ever having truly lived it.

Once this job ends, I will no longer take work solely for financial reasons. The next job I choose will be something that moves my heart. Even if it does not guarantee financial stability, I have decided to walk the path of living my life for myself.

This decision comes with anxiety. For ten years, I have prioritized work for survival over my own desires. Choosing a job based on passion is an unfamiliar territory for me. But that is okay. Even if I struggle and waver, I want to continue facing my own heart and exploring what truly matters to me.

A Journey to Discover What I Truly Want

The phrase “turn your passion into your work” has always felt somewhat unrealistic to me. However, I no longer want to use that as an excuse to continue working in a job I do not enjoy.

So, what do I want to do?

Right now, I do not have a clear answer. But I want to start by increasing the moments when my heart feels moved. Reading books, writing, traveling—no matter how small, I want to cherish my own feelings and discover things that bring me joy.

I also want to revisit the things I once gave up on. I used to think, “I can’t do this because of my disability” or “It won’t provide financial stability, so it’s impossible.” But before making such decisions, I want to have the courage to question whether those limitations are truly real.

More than anything, I want to shift away from a work style that forces me to endure financial burdens and move toward a life that I can wholeheartedly embrace. That is my next goal.

Looking Toward the Future: A Society That Supports Each Other

If anyone reading this is struggling to continue their job, I want to share a message:

“Take a moment to pause and reflect on your life.”

I am still searching for my own path. But by putting my thoughts into words, I am also reminding myself of my resolution. And if these words can encourage even one person in a similar situation, that would bring me great joy.

“It is never too late to embark on the journey of discovering what you truly want.”

Beyond this final livelihood job, I believe something I have always truly wanted awaits me. That moment will be the time when I can genuinely feel that I am living my own life.

Let us continue seeking and walking the path toward a life that is truly our own.