“Was becoming a person with a severe physical disability at the age of 30 the hardest thing you’ve ever experienced?”
This was a question I was asked during a recent interview.
Here’s how I responded:

“When you’ve lived for 30 years, you’re bound to have experienced one or two things even harder than becoming disabled.”

This answer might surprise some people. Becoming a person with a severe physical disability was undoubtedly a major turning point in my life. However, it wasn’t necessarily the hardest experience I’ve ever faced. This isn’t to downplay my disability but to emphasize the diversity of struggles people face in life. This is what I mean when I say “everyone has their own struggles.”

Avoiding Hierarchies of Pain
We often think, “My struggles are small compared to others,” or “I should be grateful because others have it worse.” But pain isn’t something we measure against others. Each person’s struggles are shaped by their unique circumstances, backgrounds, and values, which makes their experience entirely their own.

For example, failing at work, losing a loved one, or feeling crushed after chasing a dream that didn’t come true—these experiences might seem insignificant to an outsider but could be life-shattering for the person going through them. It’s not our place to judge or measure someone else’s pain.

My Personal Experience with Struggles
When I became a person with a severe physical disability at 30, I encountered many challenges. Losing the ability to move the left side of my body meant that everyday activities I used to take for granted became incredibly difficult. The future felt uncertain, and I didn’t know how I’d adapt to society.

However, what weighed on me even more than my physical disability was realizing that I had become someone who needed to be “helped.” My relationships with family and friends changed, and I struggled with feelings of self-hatred for not being able to meet their unspoken expectations. These emotional struggles were far harder for me than the physical limitations themselves.

Through this experience, I came to understand something important: everyone carries their own unique burdens, and they are doing their best to overcome them. No matter how small someone’s efforts may seem, the fact that they’re trying is worthy of respect.

Everyone Is Someone Who Has Overcome
During the interview, I also said this:

“I know that everyone has faced difficult and painful times, whether at work or in their personal lives, and I deeply respect the strength it takes to overcome them.”

Overcoming hardships is never easy, but it’s precisely this difficulty that makes the process so valuable. Whether you gain a new perspective, form deeper connections with others, or simply survive—it all matters. These moments of perseverance are proof of resilience.

For me, starting a blog after becoming disabled allowed me to connect with others who had similar experiences. Sharing our struggles and learning from one another has given me new insights I could never have gained alone. This connection has been a source of great comfort and growth.

Spreading Empathy in Society
In today’s world, it’s easy to compare ourselves to others. Social media constantly shows us the successes and happy moments of other people, making our own struggles feel even more overwhelming. However, the key is not to compare.

“Everyone has their own struggles.” Recognizing and respecting this diversity is the first step toward creating a society of empathy. Instead of dismissing someone’s pain as insignificant, imagine how hard it must have been for them. Understanding and respecting this effort is what builds a compassionate community.

Conclusion: Your Struggles Deserve Respect
Becoming disabled and the lessons I’ve learned from it aren’t unique to me. These experiences serve as a reminder that everyone faces struggles in life and that overcoming them matters deeply.

You’ve likely faced challenges in your own life. Whatever they may be, I want to express my deep respect for the strength it took for you to get through them. Take pride in the path you’ve walked and in the resilience you’ve shown.

By respecting the diverse struggles of others and spreading empathy, we can create a world where it’s easier to live as your authentic self. If this article resonated with you, I’d be thrilled if you shared it. Together, we can expand this circle of empathy and build a society where everyone feels seen and supported.